Thursday, September 16, 2010

Excuses and Caveats

All from today:

I left my Works Cited in my printer.
I have a Mac and I couldn't print on the school printers.
If I turn it in tomorrow, I only get 5% off, right?
I think my roommate deleted it.
Can I bring it to your office later today?
Do you have an extra rubric?
I need a stapler.
I e-mailed it to you.
Is this the correct format?*
Is it okay if there's blood on it?**

*It was not.
**I'm not kidding.


J. Harker said...


(My captcha, by the way, is "unfailiz". Perhaps as in, "Can you please unfailiz me? I tried super hard.")

Anonymous said...


"Is it okay if there's blood on it?"
Well, since you mentioned it.....

OK, not AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!! because I fear for OUR future in nursing homes.

Fie upon this quiet life! said...

Depends on what kind of blood. If it's yours, it's okay. But if it's, like, a chicken's -- or something that has a disease -- then, well, no. But how do I know you don't have a disease?

What the hell are people thinking???

I have to get out of teaching. I just have to.

Ink said...

Ok, the person who asked you if there is blood on it MIGHT be the one who sold me a book via amazon that had a scab on it.

I'm just saying.


C. Troubadour said...

Blood ... WTF???

I'm with jc on this one. I've already seen what nursing homes can be like, but with this crowd running the show, my life expectancy suddenly looks much worse.

The PhD Pimpernel said...

How? How on earth did they get blood on it ... or perhaps we shouldn't ask JUST CALL THE COPS!

Sounds like a good end to your week!

*stores all the possible excuses in the dossier on student behaviour!*

loveskidlit said...

I dunno. I like the blood on the homework (not in general, just in this example). Doesn't it suggest a higher quality of effort went into the product?

I once had a student, still reeking of general anaesthetic, still wearing hospital bracelet, in my office waaay too soon after her unexpected absence, making arrangements for her missed work. I use her as my general standard for "well, if you were going to be gone two weeks, why didn't you call? or email?"

But wrong format? Just no helping those students!

The Steel Magnolia said...

I was all ready to write that I had heard every one of these. Until I got to the blood. Wow. Just . . . wow.

Good Enough Woman said...

Thanks for the commiseration, everybody! And there really was blood. It was a thumb-sized smudge on the rubric. I gave him a new rubric to attach. And I did not ask WHY the blood was there.

huitzilin said...

I think I would have asked. Damn the consequences.

The Thirty-Something Bride said...

Cousin, I found a useful way for you to create furniture AND make oom in your house!

Studentmum said...

Blood! Was he/she a vampire then???? ;)

English Adjunct said...

I'm a little late on this, but I just had to comment: blood?! Very weird, but now I even more disgusted with Ink's story of the scab.

jennaseverythingblog said...

That's so funny . . . my husband is a 2nd year PhD student and he's going to start teaching in January. I'm sure he will hear the whole line-up.

TKW said...

"I needed a stapler?" Holy fuckity fuck, s/he couldn't do any better than THAT? You need a big slug-o-gin, teach.